OOM: A Discworld funeral

[scots_wolf]

Urquhart lounges by the door to the inn, sipping a last cup of tea while waiting for 'Mr. Astaire' to turn up so he could follow him to the funeral.

He's got no idea what a funeral on the Disc would be like, what with polytheism and very real gods. So, after a pleasant and relaxing night (and brief jump from window to window, back and forth), now is probably the right time for business.

Comments

[morethanprops]

The two brothers don't follow him to the inn instead turning into the shop to put away the money.

They've done all they're going to tonight.

[scots_wolf]

Urquhart wishes them a good night and returns to the inn.

What reason is there to steal any of it if they will be handed the most of it tomorrow?

In the bar room, he looks around to see how things are doing -- where Harriet is, and where Moist is, and how many drunken people have passed out on the floor.

[morethanprops]

Harriet's in the kitchen resting her feet and Moist is upstairs as the bar gets rowdier.

[scots_wolf]

Urquhart drops by the kitchen, getting himself a mug of tea generously spiked with whisky, making one for Harriet as he does so.

[morethanprops]

"Oh thank you, Hamish," She gives him a grateful smile as she sips the tea.

[scots_wolf]

"I best get upstairs," Urquhart says. "No idea when the banker will want me tomorrow to be guarded while he goes about his business."

He bends, kisses her cheek, and then takes his mug of hot tea with whisky upstairs.

This time, he thinks it better to quietly knock on Moist's door. Nobody is about, but if anybody came around the corner or up the stairs, he'd have a reason to talk to Moist now that they're officially associated.

[morethanprops]

Moist calls out, the strain of worry still in his voice, "Who is it?"

[scots_wolf]

"Me," Urquhart calls. "Hamish. I've got a question about tomorrow."

If anybody is listening -- all completely harmless.

[morethanprops]

"Oh?" He opens the door enough to put his head out and checks the hall.

[scots_wolf]

"The brothers said..." Urquhart says, stepping inside and pushing the door shut.

There had been nobody in the hall, anyway, but better to be safe.

"And here is some tea with whisky in for us to share," he finishes, when the door is firmly closed.

[morethanprops]

Moist tries not to laugh and instead takes the tea with a smirk, "Thank you."

[scots_wolf]

"There is money," Urquhart says. "Money to spare, from a cache, that they're not taking out of the shop. We can take what they have for us, and leave smoothly, with nobody the wiser and nobody after us, because nobody is affected except a hole in a wall."

[morethanprops]

"And they're also giving me some money from their inheritance so we should have a rather nice profit. I have the paperwork for them and then will say I need to leave to make sure their money flows properly with you to guard me."

[scots_wolf]

"Of course," Urquhart says. "Easy -- you need to invest the money in a bigger city. And if you ever want to return here, you just bring them fancy papers from those cities to show for your pains, which should not be hard to make."

[morethanprops]

"No, I've been working on them,"

His desk is covered with detailed forgeries of important looking papers.

[scots_wolf]

"That looks very impressive," Urquhart says. "And as we have both been working very hard tonight, we now deserve a bit of rest and relaxation?"

[morethanprops]

"We do and tomorrow we'll trade paperwork for money and leave soon after."

[scots_wolf]

"Wonderful," Urquhart says, throwing off his black cloak and slouching on the bed. "Then we'll be back in time for me not to go poof."

[morethanprops]

"No, you won't do that. We've cleared the way to leave,"

Moist hadn't thought about that and doesn't like thinking about it.

[scots_wolf]

Urquhart reaches out to catch Moist and pull him towards the bed.

Oh, he is very alive right now, never worry!

[morethanprops]

They both are and tomorrow they'll be richer and no one gets hurt.