OOM: Urquhart and Moist, preparing for a job on the Discworld

[scots_wolf]

Urquhart has a bag of fresh food dangling from his wrist, and his other arm thrown around Moist.

He unlocks the door. His room looks very inviting, tidy, and comfortable.

"Cooking first, or sex first?"

Comments

[morethanprops]

"Yes, which is rather boring."

[scots_wolf]

"Yes, hence a waste of time with rather mediocre sex," Urquhart says. "Ramon Salazar is a rather boring person, beyond all the noise."

[morethanprops]

"At least Gene Hunt has interesting buttons to push."

[scots_wolf]

"Oh yes," Urquhart says. "I'm sure he'd be much better in bed than Ramon."

[morethanprops]

"Though you'd have to be a woman for him to consider anything."

[scots_wolf]

"This is Milliways," Urquhart says. "Eventually, I will be again."

[morethanprops]

"Yes, you will. You were quite attractive that night."

[scots_wolf]

"You are good at what you're doing, too," Urquhart says. "That helps with the attractiveness. Can I have the bell peppers next?"

[morethanprops]

"Yes," Moist kisses the back of Urquhart's neck as he adds the peppers.

[scots_wolf]

Urquhart stirs the pan, giving a little shiver from the kiss. There is so much promise in it...

"I wouldn't push the Goth away, either," he says. "That could be an interestingly edgy 45 minutes, if I ever catch him at the right point."

[morethanprops]

"Oh yes, but he'd be a tricky one to seduce."

[scots_wolf]

"The trick would be to catch the right time and the right angle," Urquhart says. "But basically, he's seducable. He did sleep with his former lover when I paid that one, also."

[morethanprops]

"I wonder what his type is."

[scots_wolf]

"It seems very varied," Urquhart says. "I hear he had a vampire, at one point. And a castrato singer. And then, the man-whore."

[morethanprops]

"Did they look alike?"

[scots_wolf]

"Hmmm," Urquhart ponders. "The vampire had long golden hair and a very sweet nature; I don't know anything about the castrato, and the whore is rather small and dark-curled and a bit bristly, which he thinks is sophistication."

[morethanprops]

"Are they like the Goth and prone to overdramatizing things?"

[scots_wolf]

"That's probably it," Urquhart says. "They're emotional and intense and dramatic. I hear that at first, the Goth fought a duel to the death with the castrato because they'd offended each other that badly."

[morethanprops]

"How operatic of them. They'd fit right in Uberwald."

[scots_wolf]

Urquhart chuckles. "Absolutely," he says. "So, with the right amount of opera and drama at the right moment, it should be possible to seduce the Goth."

[morethanprops]

"Possibly while explaining how you can never truly love again but you'll try."

[scots_wolf]

"While taking shelter together in a dark and stormy night," Urquhart chuckles. "With dramatic weather outside staging the end of the world..."

[morethanprops]

"And someone coming to kill the last of your people."

[scots_wolf]

"He'd so fall for dreary Scottish tales of clan warfare, too," Urquhart says. "He'd even believe in the lake snake, but that won't get anybody laid."

[morethanprops]

"Talking about how your poor mother was eaten by a werewolf or a vampire might. Lost on the moors and gone forever."